Double Movie Review: Everest and Cooties (2015)

Greetings all,

Today I find myself at the Halifax Central Library as I type this, mostly due to conflicting movies playing and me ending up with about two hours to kill but I thought I would cover two recent films now and do the one I’m seeing tonight later this week. So let’s get started shall we?

Everest Film Review

Plot Summary - In the Spring of 1996, Commercial mountain climbing has become very popular at mount everest. Rob Hall (Jason Clarke) a new zealander and founder of commercial climbing is leading a team of both experienced and amateur mountain climbers up of Everest. But when a storm hits while they’re at the top, he and his group get separated and each must find their own way down the mountain.

Pros - It’s a very gorgeous looking film. I saw it in 3D but i’ve heard the IMAX version is stunning to look at. For the most part also the characters are likable and you do feel genuine sympathy for them in their situation.

Cons - Pretty much everything else with the film. At two hours it unfortunately suffers from trying to tell too much to fast. There’s too many people to try and remember, no one gets a great amount of screen time and several key figures to the story get majorly glossed over. Some people who become central to the plot don’t even show up till halfway through the film. If this was either longer or had been made as a documentary it would probably be much better than it is now.

Final Score - 2/10

Being so underdeveloped just sort of makes the whole thing not work that well. Had it had a longer running time, they could’ve immersed us much more fully into  the story.

Cooties Film Review

Plot Summary - Clint Hadson (Elijah Wood) is a new york city writer who has returned to his hometown and is working as a substitute teacher. On his first day there, a young girl eats a tainted chicken nugget and suddenly goes on a rampage attacking other children and staff. When Clint and the surviving teachers and one young student figure out what’s going on, they must figure out a way to survive and escape what the child calls a “cooties outbreak.”

Pros - The premise is actually kind of a funny spin on the traditional zombie outbreak story, seeing how the only people who actually turn into zombies is anyone who hasn’t hit puberty yet. It’s also a surprising piece of social commentary, particularly on the school environment in modern times. The cast is pretty solid and there’s a nice variety of characters. and the humour and the horror both balance out well. It does have plenty of moments of child zombies being beaten senseless that leave you guiltily laughing as well.

Cons - The ending is a bit abrupt, and it doesn’t take its premise just quite far enough to make it truly hysterical.

Final Score - 8/10

It’s a solid film and one I can easily recommend. It’s not going to be revolutionary in either zombie or comedy flicks, but for any fans of both it’s a good choice.

So in about 45 minutes from now I’m going to see the new Roger Waters The Wall movie so I’m excited for that. Also I will be seeing the Martian on Thursday and Sicario soon after that so look out for those reviews soon.

Until then, I’ll see you folks at the movies.

Double Movie Review: Maze Runner The Scorch Trials and No Escape (2015)

Hello All,

Back in the early days of me reviewing these films I tackled a little young adult film called The Maze Runner, a review which if you haven’t read it yet should either be along the side or in the archives. I will say at the end of that review I originally said I had no interest and seeing the next one, that is until I saw the trailers for it and it grabbed my attention enough for me to go and see it, but before that I swung by and caught myself up on No Escape. Let’s tackle Maze Runner first shall we?

Maze Runner : The Scorch Trials Review

Plot Summary - After escaping the Maze and getting rescued, Thomas (Dylan O’Brien) and his fellow gladers are taken to a facility run by Mr. Janson (Aidan Gillen) who claims that he will protect them from WCKD. All is not what it seems though as Thomas discovers the truth behind the facility and leads his friends into the Scorch.

Pros -  It is a good looking film like the other one, and the creatures in the film called cranks are interesting looking. The actors are fine for the most part as well.

Cons - Okay, SPOILER ALERT: It basically turns into a zombie movie. All the cool kind of Sci Fi bits they had from the first one are shoved to the side and it basically turns into a post apocalyptic zombie movie. Not even a good zombie movie there’s a bunch of disjointed scenes that somehow manage to feel rushed. It is basically a middle film so there’s no really good satisfying conclusion as well.

Final Score - 2/10

Like I said, it’s interesting looking, but not much else. I can only really recommend it to fans of the books.

No Escape Review

Plot Summary - Jack Dwyer (Owen Wilson) and his family have moved to an unnamed southasian country for work, but on their first day there, a revolution throws the family up against a group of rebels out to kill any foreigners. Now Jack must get his family to safety at all costs.

Pros - Pierce Brosnan is in this movie as what I would like to describe as a drunken disillusioned James Bond. He’s barely in it, but man does he just own the role, and he even manages to get a badass send off.

Cons - Pretty much everything else. The story is thin and cliched, it tries for tension and moments of despair that just come across flat, and honestly, I usually don’t really come to this conclusion, but the film comes across as kind of extremely Xenophobic. Don’t get me wrong they try to rationalize why the rebels are the gigantic assholes they’re coming across as, but it’s done in basically a hand wave and it comes across as lazy writing.

Final Score - 1/10

Yeah, it’s just bad.

I have no idea what the next review will be or when, but stay tuned.

Until then, I’ll see you folks at the movies.

Movie Review: Black Mass (2015)

Hello All,

Another thursday night review, another new film, another review. I really don’t have too much to say for this opening part so let’s just dive right into Black Mass shall we?

Plot Summary - Black Mass follows the career of notorious South Boston Gangster James “Whitey” Bulger (Johnny Depp) from his beginnings in the 70’s and his deal with FBI Agent John Connolly (Joel Edgerton) through the 80’s and his rise to power until his fall in the 90’s.

Pros - Johnny Depp is really good in this, like I had to remind myself that it was Johnny Depp by the time it was over. The rest of the cast is really stellar two although the main focus of the story is Bulger and Connolly and how both of them operated during this time. The points on their lives that they focus on are interesting for the most part, choosing certain bits and pieces of each of their lives to show incidents that might have induced changes in their thinking and behaviour.

Cons - Right off the bat, the film is not what I expected it to be. I guess some of the blame can be given to the marketing for the film and while the film works overall, it just doesn’t really dig as deep into Whitey’s criminal doings as much as they talk about what they’ve done. While they do highlight key moments they sort of gloss over the bigger picture of his influence. There’s also way too many side characters and while they were trying to show certain elements of the story from the perspective of those who were there, you’ll be forgetting names soon enough, especially since they jump between people without much notice.

Final Score - 8/10

I was originally going to give this a 7, but I bumped it up mostly because I decided that me not knowing what the film was going to be like is no fault on the part of the filmmakers. I’d say adjust your expectations and be prepared for more of a character study of the alliance between two powerful people rather than a goodfellas type of experience.

So even though I originally didn’t want to see it, the original Maze Runner review has become popular enough that I feel the need to follow it up by seeing the sequel. I will be doing it Saturday.

Until then, I’ll see you folks at the movies.

Late Movie Review: The Visit (2015)

Hello all,

Forgive the delay, some timetables shuffled and I find myself currently living under a new roof with plans to move again in the near future. But in the meantime I will do my best to keep these going as often as I can. So let’s begin this new review by quickly touching on it’s director M. Night Shyamalan. Now I did like Unbreakable, The Sixth Sense and The Village (in that order), but Signs was awful, and I’ve skipped everything else done by him but I will make note of how many people I know who hated The Last Airbender movies who were fans of the show. So I was a bit hesitant at first to see it but I heard a few rumblings about it and well, how did it do?

Plot Summary - Rebecca Jamison (Olivia DeJonge), an amateur filmmaker who’s making a documentary about her mother, and her wannabe rapper brother Tyler (Ed Oxenbould) are sent by their mother to visit their grandparents for the very first time. As the days go along, Rebecca and Tyler start to find out about their grandparents strange behaviour and begin to suspect things are not what they seem to be.

Pros - The actors are pretty good, in order being Deanna Dunagan as the grandmother, who manages to perfectly switch between overly loving grandma and creepy sleepwalker when needed. The kids are really good too, although Rebecca does more of the heavy lifting than Tyler, Rebecca (and some people are going to laugh at me for this statement) switching from being the in control older sister and the artsy filmmaker who feels the need to use as many fancy words as she can. The story manages to balance horror elements and a surprising amount of comedic moments as well. The way the film is shot, is more like Rebecca filming a documentary as opposed to be a found footage type movie, which is an improvement for the most part, so you don’t have any real background music there to build up the tension, instead relying on what’s going on screen to the job itself.

Cons - The grandfather is a bit of a one note character, as when he switches between nice and crazy it doesn’t really feel like too much of a difference. And while like I said it is shot more documentary style than found footage, it still hits a couple of the found footage sour notes that some people have found overdone. The backstory to why they’re making the doc in the first place is a bit convoluted, and finally there is the biggest elephant in the room of the film. Yes, there is a twist ending, no I’m not going to say what it is. Now, I will say that the twist isn’t saved until the very end, so we do actually get to see the results of the revelation actually play out for the last twenty minutes or so of the movie. The problem is is the fact that M. Night still feels the need to use them.

Final Score - 7/10

Someone described this film as a solid base hit of a back from retirement baseball player and I think that’s fair. It’s a solid effort and a surprisingly good pg rated horror film.

Next weekend sees four films released widely (I assume) and three of them look really good. I will try my best to see all of them. Black Mass will probably be the first one and I will try my hardest to see the other ones quickly.

Until then, I’ll see you folks at the movies.

Double Movie Review: Turbo Kid and The Transporter Refueled (2015)

Greetings all,

I would’ve posted this last night but I got home rather late, so I’ve decided to post it now instead. Today we are once again looking at two films, one of which you might have never heard of, and one which you might want to pretend you’ve never heard of. So as always, lets start with the first one shall we?

Turbo Kid

Plot Summary - In the post apocalyptic future of 1997, a lone kid (Munro Chambers) is forcefully befriended by a girl named Apple (Laurence Leboeuf). When she gets kidnapped by Skeletron (Edwin Wright) and brought before the warlord Zeus (Michael Ironside), they escape with the help of local hero Frederic (Aaron Jeffery) and find themselves on the run through the wasteland.

Pros - Laurence Leboeuf as Apple is the stand out in my mind as the overly friendly apple. She brings such great levels of energy and sweetness to the character that she genuinely grew on me. The rest of the cast is also pretty solid, finding the perfect level of balance between seriousness and humour in their characters. The writing and directing are both solid, as while the story does kind of feel mad max like, it manages to find its own spin on the post apocalyptic.

Cons - They use the classic “oh im dead but not really” thing way too many times for my liking, plus despite it’s intention to be one, the ending still comes off as way too much of a bummer.

Final Score - 8/10

So yeah, turbo kid for the most part is pretty solid. if you’re a fan of retro futuristic 80’s love letters, check it out.

The Transporter Refueled

Plot Summary - Frank Martin (Ed Skrein) is a getaway driver for hire living on the french riviera. While his dad Frank Martin Senior (Ray Stevenson) retires and stays with him for a few days, the transporter gets a call for a job from Anna (Loan Chabanol) and gets him to drive. But when they need further assistance, Anna and her gang kidnap his father in order to keep him around.

Pros - Ray Stevenson is pretty funny as Frank Martin senior and there is one pretty awesome sequence that has Junior basically ghost riding his car while he beats up a bunch of guys.

Cons - There’s two major ways this movie could’ve been done much better, either by having Jason Statham come back, or instead of a transporter movie, have be solely about Anna and her gang taking down their pimp overlord which spoiler alert by the way. But with what we have here my god it’s fucking stupid. In the opening scene they show when the villain and his goonies took over the riviera, but then not even twenty minutes later we see them in the present day, and then they needlessly cut back to the opening scene to show us who they are. My first thought was literally well no fucking duh its those guys otherwise why would you show them? this movie’s plot is so thin and yet they try to needlessly pad it in the worst ways possible. I mean for christs sake they try and make it so that frank and the pimp have a past more complicated than oh i hired him once as a driver, and it doesn’t do anything to help the story whatsoever. Nothing. Also, the all female gang are boring because the movie has nothing for them to do other than look hot and kiss each other randomly. Yeah that’s another thing this movie is guilty off, itll randomly cut away to two girls kissing at least three times. Why? what’s the context other than to grab the slowly dropped attention of the people watching it. The last thing is that for the entire film, Frank Martin senior keeps calling his son Junior. I know people do this in real life, but the entire film I kept thinking you’re not Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade please stop trying.

Final Score - 2/10

Ray Stevenson keeps this from being a one, but it’s still awful. I’m leaving Ed Skrein out of this only because it was his first feature and he wasn’t really noteworthy.

Anyways I have to go, not sure what the next review will be of but until then,

I’ll see you folks at the movies.